"Who"ever Angers You, Controls You!

"Who"ever Angers You, Controls You!
By Al Spath

Control can take various avenues, but are they impacting your attention? I asked a number of online players who were quick to provide their take on how "emotions" play a significant role at the table.

Comments from the rail...paraphrased

"Yes they can distract you a bit, but hell I very rarely am paying 100% attention to the game. Something I need to work on. So I try not to let it affect my poker decisions. I am guilty of one thing though and that is if someone is being a real a$$hole I love to be very kind to him/her. Example: I was playing a guy the other day when my flush hit and I got to check raise him. He said (in a belittling voice) if the flush card did not come where would I be? I said yes you are right sir but it did come, and I thanked him for his money as he stormed off into the night."

"Well I'm not easily put on tilt, but I'll share one with ya, and yeah.. it controlled me. Matter of fact I fumed all weekend about it in Vegas. I'm not going to go into details, but I LET (because of my low bet) a little old timer in Vegas draw out on me. I had the two pair. He drew and hit the river for his flush so shame on me! I can live with that...lesson learned. After the hand he smugly grinned at me as if saying "that is why little ladies like you shouldn't be playing poker with the big boys," and giggled.

I still fume, just telling it. I walked away from the table mad at him. By morning (after reliving it all night long) I realized I should be blaming myself. I LET him do it after all. I still think he was an Azz though."

"I wonder if that can extend to "what" angers you, as the effect can be almost the same but instead of someone else controlling you, something inanimate can. The effect could be that you yourself could be your own worst enemy and a loss of control is a loss of control. Personal attacks can definitely affect that player (and in a way, both players). The damage to an individual because of his or her perceived shortcoming is more than I can handle and that is when I earn my nickname "the honey badger" and don't tell me it is none of my business. I think it is all our business. How we want to be treated and how we treat others affects us even when we are not playing."

"Who angers me? Well I can only remember one time online that a player angered me while I was playing, and as I recall that was my fault. I had angered him a couple of days before that by making rude comments to him at his table in a tourney. And I will tell you that I was never able to gain concentration, and took an early exit. Yes I could have shut the chat off, but chose not to because I knew if I was playing live I would not be able to shut it off, and wanted to test my ability to cope with it. I have been angered several times by my spouse before or while playing, and that also caused some problems, but I since have learned to deal with that pretty good.

Who, or what controls me? I like to think that when I sit down to play I am the only one that controls me, but there has been several instances that alcohol did control and affect the way I played. So I do try to refrain from using alcohol when playing now, the results from it were devastating and I know that I can't mix drinking and poker together. Some may be able to but I'm just not one of them."

"External or internal, the battle rages for control of the poker machine. Clear the area; clean the slate on both fronts. Time to get personal with yourself. Forgive yourself, forgive others, let it go, move on with life, everything you've done, seen, or said, is a combination of what you are now, no shame, no guilt, if you have it, get over it and do what you must, to right it. If you can't, learn from it and never do it again.

Be in balance, mentally and physically. You have to be into control in order to give control over to someone or something. Make a decision to be in control, accept responsibility for yourself and your actions. Tall order and the battle never ends, you will lose it at times and fall from grace, but you will not be alone, just practice damage control, pick up the pieces and give it another go."

It seems pretty clear that control of your emotions is a must when playing poker and equally as clear that players struggle (both internally and externally) with this issue. Can you actually avoid tilt, or at least prevent "steaming" when things don't go your way or someone creates a situation that either angers, frustrates, or infuriates you? I hope so, because there are players just waiting to test your patience and discipline. Don't let them anger you or control you!